Church Therapy in Crisis Situations

The Church Therapy model creates accessible mental health care within the church setting, decreasing stigma and changing a church’s internal culture around mental health issues. The presence of a therapist on a church staff provides ongoing day-to-day support and care. However, one of the best advantages of the Church Therapy model is the presence of a trained and licensed mental health professional when a crisis arises. Skills like de-escalation, crisis intervention, conflict resolution and trauma/grief processing are extremely valuable when moments of crisis occur in the church.

A couple years ago our church experienced the loss of a young woman dear to the hearts of many in our congregation. She had been with us for several years before having to move out of state with family as her health declined due to cancer. She died on a Wednesday morning, and her death became known to us that afternoon. As my husband prepared for the Wednesday night service and small group time, we realized that some people in each small group would be experiencing significant grief, while others who were more new to the congregation did not know the woman who had passed away. The small group leaders were unsure how to handle a group with such varied needs.

In talking through our options, my husband and I decided it would be best for me to lead a grief group for all who needed to process our friend’s death. About 10-12 people joined me that night, allowing the usual small groups to function as they normally would in discussion on the Bible passage presented. Those who joined me were distraught, feeling a range of emotions as anyone would in the midst of the untimely death of a young person. We walked through our initial thoughts and feelings: what was it like to hear the news? What were our first reactions? From there we shared memories and stories, moving from deep despair into laughter and joy. We found closure in thinking about what we might say to our friend if we could tell her one more thing, and we spent time in prayer for the requests that we knew were dearest to her heart.

The grief group was a healing time, met with gratefulness on the part of those who got to participate as well as on the part of the small group leaders who had felt ill-equipped to know how to help the grieving. In fact, we were able to conduct a grief group a second time more recently after another sudden, tragic death. There are many other types of crisis situations that have also arisen in our congregation, such as domestic disputes that made their way into the church auditorium, people in active psychosis attending the service, and interpersonal conflicts between church members to name a few. These situations have been handled with care and skill because of my professional training in these areas, and without those skills many of these situations could have escalated into a much worse crisis. The pastors and ministry leaders have been able to gain new crisis response skills as well, creating a broader range of people who may be a first-responder in an unexpected crisis.

A Story That Needs To Be Told

Scott was a man well-known to our church and to our city. He was a hard worker, a family man, an adopter of neighborhood kids, and a master in the kitchen. His favorite was breakfast… Bacon and eggs.

When your surprise 50th birthday party becomes your funeral, there is a lot for a family to process. Of course, those who knew Scott well knew that he battled addiction for a long time. His emotional struggles lay very deep underneath a surface that most saw as a friendly face. Scott had accountability partners, went to church every week, got group support, and prayed for miracles daily. The consensus among his friends and family was that no one wanted to be rescued from addiction more than Scott. There is no greater amount of faith that a person could possess to bring about a deliverance. And while we all asked, “Why?” we also knew that Scott’s prayers truly had been answered. Addiction can no longer hold him in its grip.

I helped compile this book for Scott’s wife and two daughters to help provide for them this Christmas. Less than a month ago they lost their husband and father and immediately had to jump into Thanksgiving and the holiday season. I believe that Scott’s story needs to be told, and I also believe that those of us who claim to care about mental health and addiction need to do more than talk about it. For me, this is a James 1:27 moment. We demonstrate the love of Jesus when we do something practical to care for orphans and widows.

This is a family I personally know well. It is just one situation, but it is one for which we can make a genuine difference.

All proceeds of this book will go directly to Scott’s wife, Lisa. Buy it. Share it.

Take in the pictures and letters that tell a story of a man deeply missed. Help break the stigma of addiction by participating in the storytelling of those whose voices have been lost to a fatal illness.

You can also support Scott’s family by donating here: https://www.gofundme.com/scottmacefamilyfund

An End to Endings

I wrote this poem after the death of my aunt. In the midst of tragic loss I hope it may be of help to those who grieve.

 

Death, despair, devastation.

Life shortened, stolen, snatched.

This is no invention of God.

Creator, Sustainer Unmatched.

 

Dust once breathed to life in an instant

Turns dry as all seems to end.

The perishable perishes, to dust it returns

While His breath brings to life once again.

 

The one who prowls and seeks to devour.

This work is of his evil mind.

Love, joy, goodness, life:

God’s creation, imagination, design.

 

And now this is our cry of hope:

Victory rescues the life that he stole.

 

This pain we feel will be no more

When His will working is wholly realized.

Sorrow no longer the song of our souls

As we dance death down to its demise.

 

Its sting stings us now,

Darkness declares its day.

But even in this, praise yet pervades.

Power put in its proper place.

 

The last enemy destroyed is death.

So fight on, defeaters of sin.

May even this day be one of defeat

For the fool who thought he could win.

 

Hear, hopeless ones:

Hearts are healed here and now

Freedom forever proclaimed.

Tragedy to be trampled eternally

When together we honor His Name.